Replaced

I went to visit my family in Israel but ended up having a pretty full- blown spiritual week, since I was hanging out with healers and psychics and Kabala master minds. I didn't really intend to but that's how it happened and I also got some pretty amazing results I will tell you all about maybe later.
I also felt the far -away existence of my reality and how detached my life can be, traveling here and there and not REALLY ever surrounding my self with the kind of unconditional acceptance I so need.
I have been thinking about the replacement factor of my life; How I am constantly being replaced ; As we speak, I can give you three examples of current productions that simply replaced me. I sang there before. now it's back; same costumes, same director/ conductor, even some of the original cast, but not me. Normal people with normal jobs, might get replaced once or twice at their job, in their entire life time, only if they were dreadful. But performers, with their gentle, already hurt soul, get exchanged and replaced on a monthly basis.
How do I feel about it? as much as I understand it; Still shitty.
I can only hope that my dear ones don't replace me, and that my friends won't rush to the next special, fun girl, (or whatever, which exists anyway, just like good Mezzo Sopranos, a dime a dozen), and forget I ever was there before... and if they do, I might throw some auditions and find out maybe there is a girl out there who can play me better.